Being an Awesome Muslim Father - What Does that Even Mean?

IrambintSafia

My Children’s Father is a Dua Manifested

I remember distinctly when I used to think about being married, I always stressed in my duas, “Ya Allah, give my children a loving, gentle father”.

Sometimes when you reflect back you are struck with awe, Allah Subhan Wa Tala guides us to make duas, because He Al Wahab wants us to receive them, even before we are truly aware of the real understanding of our ask.

In this dua I was clear that I will be a mother In Shaa Allah someday and as a bonus I wanted my spouse to be a good dad.

Fast forward 16 years of marriage and my children are his fans. They love him, not because he is easy but because he is a human being in a leadership role who leads his flock with well-balanced differentiation of discipline and kindness.

I pray we would raise our children with the true understanding of Quran, sunnah and love of Allah. Our fathers are our Qawwam, leaders, role models. May we raise a generation of fathers who will fulfil the rights of their families and their communities, Ameen.

Urdu Adventures

Father: A Daughter's Best Friend

The first time I wore my hijab my mum was abroad. I had decided on the day I would start wearing it, now the day was here and my mum was not here to help me. What was I going to do? Wait for mum to get back or get on with it? 

I had asked my dad to take me shopping. He was calling for me, telling me to hurry up. When I came down, my dad gave me a small smile, I didn't want him to notice or say anything. I could feel my face going red. Then came the soothing words “you took your time”. Phew I was relieved he didn’t say anything.

At the shops my dad helped me pick my first few hijabs. He discussed the colours and designs, he did that because it was important to me. Till this day, I really believe that my father would have preferred my mother to be there for that moment as he believes he may not have done or said the right thing. The truth is he is enough for me. What he says is enough for me. Sometimes within our roles as mothers or fathers we feel we are not doing the best we can or we compare ourselves to others. It doesn't need to be like that. Look at it from a child’s point of view, they see and feel unconditional love and don’t hear all those funny voices arguing in your head. Enjoy the moments and create memories!

LoveLearningOnline

I Am Not Him and He is Not Me 

One of my biggest struggles is understanding my husband’s point of view and trying to get on the same page of parenting. During one of the lives we did on a Friday with Parenting In Peace Coach, Farah Halabi is when I had a lightbulb moment she said - why do you have to be on the same page? You’re not the same person you don’t see things the same way. You don’t actually need to be on the same page. It brought a real sense of clarity and I try not to judge ‘his way’ of doing things as much as before, peaceful life here we come!

When we think we have to be on the same page it assumes that we have to be in complete synchronicity with the other persons thoughts, feelings and values at the exact same time! 🤯🤯🤯🤯

When we understand that isn’t even possible we can begin to deal with what is in front of us (reality) as opposed to what we think should be happening (expectation).👌🏽

MyMoon Online

It Takes a Man to be a Father

It Takes Someone Special to be a Step-Dad

I married a man who is now a step-father to my children Alhamdulillah. One day I was working upstairs on my computer, when the kids came to me: “Mommy, please read a book for us.” I told them: “I'm sorry I need to finish my work” and promised them to read it later. So I heard how they went down the stairs and asked my husband: “Can you read a book for us please?” He was speaking on the phone so I felt sorry for them to get the second “no”. But what he did was different. He told the person on the phone: “Sorry I got to do something important, I'll call you back later.” And he sat down and read with them. I was so amazed. 

And guess what - it took him some days only to become the most trusted friend to my children AlhamdulilAllah. May Allah bless and reward him. If we adults show our children that their concerns are important to us and that we do care, this will in sha Allah make amazing relationships forever.

What does 'being an awesome father 'mean to you?